My wife, an ordained minister, and I have been married for twenty-six years. I like to joke that I am “the pastor’s wife”. By profession, I am an early childhood educator and have worked with and around children for closing in on thirty-years in addition to raising two children of our own. One of the things I know about marriage and about raising children is that it is like a dance in which you each take turns leading and following. At no time in this dance are the children left to figure out the steps without at least a supportive choreographer. When my wife left her well-paying secular job to answer her Call to the ministry, it was my turn to focus on the family while she focused on her Call. Our children deserved nothing less.
This is my problem with “Commander in Chief”. Geena Davis stars as the first woman President and her husband, played by Kyle Secor, seems to think that he should have a powerful career, too. I can very much relate to feelings about having to take the second seat, of having to give up a career and follow your spouse. It’s tough; I grieve at times for my career I left in upstate New York when we moved to West Virginia. But, sheesh! That is what a successful marriage is about: give and take. This character rather than realizing it is his turn to give, first considers accepting a job as baseball commissioner and then ultimately ends up with an advisory role in the administration. All the while, the preschooler and two teens flounder because he is too focused on his own needs. Those children need an ever-present father who is focused on helping them to deal with the unfathomable challenges of living in the White House. They don’t need a father who is worried about his own career more than the feelings of his children.
Alright, I do know it is only a television show but that character really does irritate me.